January 2012
ass < titties
bloodgods:
ass < titties
i fixed it! a pair of titties is essentially an ass that doesn’t poop, has nipples, and is more squishy. also, i lack a defined ass.
i guess the magical phrase to type when someone that you don’t want to flirt with is flirting with you is “i sleep nude!” he hasn’t replied in 17 minutes…success!
unfunnywhitegirl:
it’s weird having basically two separate lives in different places with two separate sets of people that get excited and hug you when you return to them
college problems.
i’m in this weird stage of my life where dudes that i went to high school with are trying to get into my pants. where was all this love four years ago?! oh yeah, i was painfully shy and awkward for the first two years of high school, and in a relationship for the last two.
Things that have happened in the past week:
1. I had three photoshoots!
2. I had sex with someone I went to high school with. It’s pretty amazing if I forget about guitar class and how I used to have the biggest crush on his best friend.
3. I fucked my cousin’s boyfriend’s friend. I had promptly decided not to have sex with him when he was clearly very disgusted that he has the same name as a gay porn star, but my cunt...
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I’m putting together a fuckbuddy-friendly sex playlist made up of songs that DON’T contain the word “love” in the title or lyrics, because I can’t think of anything more horrifying than two people trying to have sex but breaking down and crying over the one they loved and lost, instead.
it’s all fun and games until your vagina devours the condom.
I took headshots of performers at a theater that one of my friends works at. After I emailed some of the best ones to her, she asked me if I could send her more, because half of them were blurry. Um, they’re hardly blurry! Sure, you can’t see every individual eyelash, but they’re photos of faces. Fuck. I did the best I could with the theater’s shitty lighting. I’m...
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“I’m falling in love with Benjamin
because I like his upper lip.”
– Francesca Woodman
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unfunnywhitegirl:
SPEAKING OF SEX. you’d think that “wake up i wanna touch your willy” would be enough to arouse a man from even the deepest of slumber but apparently not hello excuse me i have needs like a boy who has just hit puberty pay attention to my downstairs
i need this on a t-shirt.
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Richard Brautigan, "A Mid-February Sky Dance"
saturnrising:
Dance toward me, please, as if you were a star with light-years piled on top of your hair, smiling,
and I will dance toward you as if I were darkness with bats piled like a hat on top of my head.
(emdashesandhyphens via fragilethoughts-)
Nothing like coming in from a cold night to a hot...
ghettorock:
Best to all in this new year. ^.^
woah, i misread “hot tamale” as “hot female”.
it’s been a week since we talked, and i was the last to say something, so i’m assuming i scared away my fuck buddy. all i did was casually mention bondage!
okay, on to happy times! resolutions for 2012: 1. don’t cry (i already broke it) 2. be more daring. 3. let confidence rise to the surface. 4. love those who love me. fuck (as in don’t fuck) the ones who say they do, but secretly fuck with my mind and push me away. 5. get involved in the porn industry. 6. make $30,000. i don’t know if this is low or high to most, but considering...
this time last year, i was in a relationship and my eyes were probably watering. now, i’m fucking crying again. i predict that next year, i will be atop a unicorn, crying. it’s sort of comforting, though, knowing that regardless of my circumstances, i will cry.
